AFRICA: Akhwari--Greatest Last Place Finish Ever

Have you ever heard of John Stephen Akhwari? If not, you should find out who he is, and you should share his story with your children. Let me help you.

John Stephen Akhwari is a marathon runner from Tanzania. He was the African champion runner and he competed in the 1968 Olympics in Mexico City. Even though Akhwari had previously beaten the man who would win the gold medal in the men's marathon that year, Akhwari is mostly known for having the worst marathon finishing time in the history of the Olympics. But really, the time isn't the important part--the finishing is. 

Here is the quote he is most famous for:

"My country did not send me 5,000 miles to start the race. They sent me 5,000 miles to finish it."

Akhwari's Olympic marathon finish is nothing short of heroic given all the circumstances and given his tenacious grit. He is an amazing example! I like everything about the following video except that at the end it categorizes Akhwari's finish as one of the "strangest." I disagree. I think it's one of the best and most inspiring.

Years later, Akhwari was called upon to be honored and participate in the 2008 Olympics in Beijing, carrying the torch. Here is a good follow up article on Akhwari's life since his famous finish. 

Whether you're studying Africa, the Olympics, focusing on biographies, working on character development, or need a story for a Family Home Evening lesson on enduring to the end, John Stephen Akhwari from Mbulu, Tanzania, Africa is someone to talk about.

No, I'm Not

No, I'm Not

by Sasha Takis

It happened again.  I was checking out at a warehouse store and the cashier asked, “Do you homeschool?”  I smiled and nodded.  Then she said, “You must be so patient.” She went on to say that some days she just couldn’t wait to send her kids off to school.  I clenched my jaw and swiped my card.  

I’ve grown so weary of the familiar assumptions.

“You must be so organized.”

“You are a saint!”

“You must be a lot smarter than I am.”

“You’re so brave!”

“You must be so patient.”

Guess what, people?  I am none of these things.  I am so not these things that sometimes I want to shout it.  Yes, there is some vain part of my persona that has occasionally puffed up at the praise and even been pleased that this is what other people think of me.  But the bigger part of me, the honest me, wants everyone to have a reality check.  Why?  Well, it’s too much pressure for one.  Secondly, and more importantly, it frustrates me that people think that they have to be these things in order to homeschool.  As if they themselves might consider homeschooling—if, and only if, the Virtue Fairy would come and bestow these gifts.  It annoys me that people put on blinders and assume that all public school teachers and college professors are all of these things.  (Because let me tell you, I’ve met more than several hands full who are not.)  People are people!  We all put our pants on one leg at a time; we all have different strengths and weaknesses to work with and we all have something to offer, no matter what we are or what we are not.

So what am I?  I am a mother who loves my children and is trying the best way I know to do what’s right and best for them.  So, before walking off with my purchases, I smiled at the cashier and simply said, “I’m really not that patient.  I just don’t want someone else getting the best years of my kids’ lives.”

************************************************************************

Originally written for and published in LDSNHA's Sentinel.

Taking the Summer Off

Preface:  I've taken a really, really long break from blogging. I'll give it one more go. It's discouraging to spend the time and then see that your blog only gets a few hits and those are mostly from random porn sites. If I get more of a regular readership, I'll keep going. 

The summer of 2017 was the best summer I've had in a long time. It's not that other summers haven't been good; there are always highlights and happy moments. Most summers as a whole, though, have left me feeling empty and exhausted, wondering where the time went and feeling like a victim of circumstance. I did not want one more summer that did not feel like summer, whatever that meant. I had a vague, elusive notion of what I thought summer should be and I wanted to make it happen. This was the year I lived summer on purpose.

For many years we have homeschooled through the summer. There have been various reasons, including but not limited to climate (the years we lived in Seattle meant cold and rainy Junes and Julys, and the years in Utah meant some days too hot to be outside so might as well study inside) and schedules (vacations in spring or fall or busy baseball/softball schedules meant makeup in summer). There was the belief that homeschooling is our lifestyle and learning never (or at least it should never) stops so, continuing our studies made sense. There was a sense that if we didn't continue homeschooling through the summer we were wasting time. And kids can certainly get bored easily so why not do something more worthwhile with that time? 

Here's the problem. Well, problems. Every change in season brings a new set of demands and activity. It is certainly possible to happily homeschool through each and every season, but as I always say, "If I am doing this then there is something else I am not doing." In this case that means that if I am going to spend my time and energy homeschooling, there are other things I cannot do because there is only so much time and energy to go around. I love to garden, but it takes a lot of time and energy. I love traveling with my children to baseball/softball tournaments, but it takes a lot of time and energy. I love to enjoy the types of activities that can only be done in hot, summer weather, but it takes a lot of time and energy. For years I have tried to do all of these things at the same time, with the time and energy simply running out. At the end of the summer I feel like a big, fat failure at everything. I can't truly enjoy any particular activity at any given time because I feel the constant weight of the other activities waiting their turned to be crammed into my life. 

Coming out of a hard spring, wanting summer to be different, but feeling the weight of my own expectations for everything, I was still going to stubbornly forge ahead with a unit study over the summer. But I couldn't stop thinking about how badly I needed a successful garden this year, the past years having been mediocre at best to straight up fails because I tried to do too much and/or was gone too much. I had numerous outdoor projects I wanted to do but I had put them off for years due to lack of that ever so limited time and energy I keep talking about. I couldn't stop thinking about how thoroughly exhausted I was. Looking ahead, I had 12 weekend tournaments in a row coming up, the first 10 of which were all out of town. (And mind you, laundry and meals and regular housework doesn't diminish in summer just because outdoor chores increase or because you're away from home more.) And then came the real epiphany:  I realized that for all my efforts at summer schooling over the years, we'd never amounted more than a good solid week or two of schooling when you added everything together. 

Then, my kids begged for a summer break. They, too, were exhausted and burned out. They had some good points to make. And all of a sudden, taking a break from homeschooling was the only logical, sane, and humane thing to do.

So we did.

And. It. Was. Glorious.

Instead of looking out my window longingly at the hammock in my back yard, I climbed in it and read adult fiction under the shade trees. Adult fiction! I haven't read adult fiction in at least a decade because I'm always pre-reading literature for my kids or reading nonfiction for a multitude of reasons. I finally had some wiggle room and didn't feel guilty taking advantage of it.

Instead of wishing we had more time to go swimming, fishing, hiking, etc., I conscientiously planned it and made it happen every week because, that was the plan, for a change.

I could go on. But it wasn't all leisure and play. If it had been, I'd have been just as dissatisfied with my summer as I would if we'd only worked.  I believe in the wisdom of Aesop's "The Grasshopper and the Ants," but more importantly, work is good for the soul and everyone feels better when they've done a job well.  And, after all, there was the garden. 

If you are one who chooses to homeschool year round, this is in no way meant to dissuade you. Everyone's lives look different from each other's. It's really about finding balance. Ha. It's always about finding balance. This was the summer of fixing my scales.

Cleaned up a flower bed.

Found a perfect picnic spot.

Canned 50 jars of summer applesauce.

The beach!

Finally grew cucumbers successfully.

Kayaked for the first time.

Invented a new holiday recipe.

Wildflower hike!

What To Do Guides for Kids' Problems and Emotions

A big shout out to my friend, Audrey, for telling me about these books!

There is actually a whole series of these books written by Dawn Huebner, Ph.D., a "clinical psychologist in Exeter, New Hampshire, specializing in the treatment of children and their parents." (Because parents are part of the equation!) While the books say they are written for children ages 6-12, I've found the simple, straightforward, honest presentation good for older kids and myself as well. It is written in a way that children totally understand the concepts and it gives parents a vocabulary to have in common with their children in trying to help them (and themselves!) overcome challenges.

There are drawing activities inside that are probably helpful for younger children but feel too elementary for older ones. Some of these things we skip over because they are super obvious, some things I adapt into more of a writing exercise, and some things we just talk about. Because there are truths in these books, they lend themselves to coinciding with scripture, also, which we find to go along. I feel like I've been able to have some very good one on one discussions with family members as a result of reading these books together, and I've also had some introspective moments reflecting on my own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.

Learning the Ways of Jesus - Pictures for Primary

The Primary Sharing Time theme for April this year is "Jesus Christ Teaches Me to Choose the Right." Choristers are to choose a song appropriate to the theme. I will be teaching "I'm Learning the Ways of Jesus" by Janice Kapp Perry. This is a song published in the Friend magazine in 2010. You can find sheet music here. 

I love this song! As nice as "I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus" is, I prefer this song for this year as it recognizes and mentions choice in the lyrics and that fits so well with the "Choose the Right" theme of 2017. Further, this song is much more specific in how to be like Jesus and what His ways are.

Here is a video of the song from the Church's website:

To teach the song to my Primary children, I've prepared two banners per verse with pictures and lyrics. Using a roll of banner paper from Walmart, I cut four lengths and put four pictures on each banner, writing the words that accompany each picture with poster markers below. (I do like to mix things up with flip charts, banners, posters, actions, chalkboard drawings, etc. for learning words to songs. Sometimes flip charts frustrate me, though, because the printed words are often not big enough for children sitting in the back to see.) For the final "I try every day to give love away. I'm learning the ways of Jesus" lines, I didn't reprint; I will just point back to the previous pictures and words.

I spent a long time hunting for just the right pictures to use so I thought I'd share them here in case anyone wants to teach this song to Primary children or their own children, whether as a part of homeschool or in Family Home Evening or whatever.

I'm learning each day to be caring and kind.

I think of good deeds in my heart and my mind.

I try every day to give love away.

I'm learning the ways of Jesus.

So if I see someone who's lost or afraid,

I'll offer to help. That's a choice I have made.

Or if I see someone who just needs a friend,

I'll speak to them kindly and spend time with them.

I try every day to give love away.

I'm learning the ways of Jesus.

I'm learning each day to be friendly and fair.

I try to help others; I willingly share.

I try every day to give love away.

I'm learning the ways of Jesus.

So if I see someone who can't walk or run,

I'll think of some ways I can help them have fun.

Or if I see someone who can't see or hear,

I'll tell them that I'll be their eyes or their ears.

I try every day to give love away.

I'm learning the ways of Jesus.

Already in Love with 2017

I am already in love with 2017. Not because, three hours into the new year, anything particularly marvelous has happened to influence my opinion or outlook already (though I did toast my family and some good friends with a very tasty apple-pomegranate sparkling cider) or because I'm one of those who figures 2016 was so bad that anything else has gotta be better. It's true that my year last year did have some major pits, potholes, and pathetic and perplexing problems; I'm certain I cried more in the past year than I've cried my entire life. But it's also true that there were moments of great clarity, times when I was supported and sustained by friends both in Heaven and on Earth, and the blessings were too many to count. No, I am in love with 2017 because I hope and have faith.

Many people hope when a new year rolls around, if they haven't become too hard and cynical anyway. It's what people hope that varies. I honestly don't know how anyone can hope without faith, and I do mean faith in a Father in Heaven and His Son, Jesus Christ. Sure, people can have faith in loved ones or financial institutions or themselves, or whatever else, but all of those things are subject to the faults and frailties of the mortal condition. I have hope and faith because time and again my Heavenly Father has brought me to and through things--strengthened and taught and directed me--and time and again I have marveled at how He never gives up on me, even when I feel I might as well give up on myself. I know He hears and answers my prayers--every one, spoken and unspoken--down to the tiniest of details. And at the beginning of this new year I have the most hope ever in the Atonement of Jesus Christ. The year 2016 really was the Year of the Atonement for me, as I saw firsthand the fruits of it in people's lives and saw the unmistakable and undeniable change in these people. In different places and through various ways I felt an incredible witness of the truth and power of the Atonement. I am not perfect. Uh, not even close. But I can look back over the last year and see improvement and it makes me giddy with anticipation at how I can change and become this next year with God's grace.  I am certain there are going to be some really bad days in 2017. Lots of tears. Pain. Grief. Regret. I won't accomplish half of what I want, I won't change quite as much as I'd like, I'll probably take one step back for every two steps forward. But I stand at the doorway of the new year, glad to be alive and able to think, choose, and change and looking forward with hope and faith.

BUSY - Being Under Satan's Yoke

I found the following while going through a very old stack of papers. I have from time to time recalled this lesson when my life seems full of inconsequential busy-ness and I feel the Heavens are quiet and I am far adrift from my spiritual moorings. It's definitely something to think about.

BUSY

Satan called a worldwide convention. In his opening address to his evil angels. he said, "We can't keep the Christians from going to church. We can't keep them from reading their Bibles and knowing the truth. We can't even keep them from conservative values. But we can do something else. We can keep them from forming and intimate, abiding relationship with Christ. If they gain that connection with Jesus, our power over them is broken. So let them go to church, let them have their conservative lifestyles, but steal their time, so they can't gain that experience in Jesus Christ.

"This is what I want you to do, angels. Distract them from gaining hold of their Savior and maintaining that vital connection throughout their day!"

"How shall we do this?" shouted his angels.

"Keep them busy in the nonessentials of life and invent unnumbered schemes to occupy their minds," he answered. "Tempt them to spend, spend, spend, then borrow, borrow, borrow. Persuade the wives to go to work for long hours and the husbands to work 6-7 days a week, 10-12 hours a day, so they can afford their lifestyles. Keep them from spending time with their children. As their family fragments, soon, their homes will offer no escape from the pressures of work. Over stimulate their minds so that they cannot hear that still, small voice.  Entice them to play the radio or cassette player whenever they drive, to keep the TV, VCR. CDs and the PCs going constantly in their homes. And see to it that every store and restaurant in the world plays non-biblical, contradicting music constantly. This will jam their minds and break that union with Christ.

"Fill their coffee tables with magazines and newspapers. Pound their minds with the news 24 hours a day. Invade their driving moments with billboards. Flood their mailboxes with junk mail, sweepstakes, mail order catalogs, and every kind of newsletter and promotional offering free products, services, and false hopes. Even in their recreation, let them be excessive. Have them return from their recreation exhausted, disquieted, and unprepared for the coming week. Don't let them go out in nature to reflect on God's wonders. Send them to amusement parks, sporting events, concerts, and movies instead.

"And when they meet for spiritual fellowship, involve them in gossip and small talk so that they leave with troubled consciences and unsettled emotion. Let them be involved in soul-winning, but crowd their lives with so many good causes that they have no time to seek power from Christ. Soon they will be working in their own strength, sacrificing their health and family for the good of the cause."

It was quite a convention in the end. And the evil angels went eagerly to their assignments causing Christians everywhere to get busy, busy, busy, and rush here and there.

Has the devil been successful at his scheme? You be the judge.

What about this definition of BUSY?

B-Being U-Under S-Satan's Y-Yoke 

I think sometimes we get mixed up. For instance, we are supposed to be "anxiously engaged," and we are warned and commanded not to be idle, but I think we can be busy and idle simultaneously, and we can be busy without being truly engaged. For instance, think of an employee who is always looking to look busy, without really having to work. You know, the guy who does a cart run even though he just did that. From my own experience, I relate to the junk mail reference listed above:  when it comes time to clean up areas in my home I often find that way too much time ends up being spent on mail and flyers and newspapers and whatever other papers are lying about. Before I know it, my time to tidy is gone and all I've done is read a bunch of junk. It's so frustrating!

All too often I am regretfully busy. I say this because there are times when a neighbor or family member or friend will say, "I would have (asked, told, talked to) you, but you're so busy I didn't want to bother you." Oh, the sting! So let's ever keep in mind that "being busy" can too often morph into "being too busy."

A few more thoughts:

"I fear that many of us rush about from day to day taking for granted the holy scriptures. We scramble to honor appointments with physicians, lawyers, and businessmen. Yet we think nothing of postponing interviews with Deity--postponing scripture study. Little wonder we develop anemic souls and lose our direction in living. How much better it would be if we planned and held sacred fifteen or twenty minutes a day for reading the scriptures. Such interviews with Deity would help us recognize his voice and enable us to receive guidance in all of our affairs." -Carlos E. Asay, 

"I've come to understand something that happened to me in my early teens. I was in a hurry when I felt, not heard, a voice, an impression, which I knew then was from God. It was close to these words: 'Someday, when you know who you really are, you will be sorry that you didn't use your time better.' I thought then that the impression was odd, since I thought I was using my time pretty well and I thought I knew who I was. Now, years later, I am beginning to know who I am - and who you are - and why we will be so sorry if we do not invest our time well...." -Henry B. Eyring

Brigham Young's Family Room

In the heart of downtown Salt Lake City, Utah, a row of Pioneer-era dwellings stand preserved. In addition to being family homes, these were the Official Residence of the President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and the Executive Offices of the Territory of Utah. Several prophets occupied the office and a few the home. 

The house on the left is the Lion House, which was the private home of Brigham Young's family. The house to the far right is the Beehive House, which was the state home to use for guests and dignitaries. Many years later these buildings became boarding homes for young working women in the city to safely dwell in, as well as social gathering centers for college co-eds. The Lion House is so named because Brigham Young had the nickname "Lion of the Lord." The Beehive House is named after the early settling Saints' industry. They first called their colony in Utah Territory Deseret, which means "honeybee" in The Book of Mormon. The beehive was adopted as their official emblem, representing industry, and is still a state symbol.

Standing in this historical oasis in the midst of downtown traffic, sirens, and bustle, I wished to go back in time and visit before the skyscrapers and traffic lights. I did find a photo of when these buildings were fairly new and I still marvel at all that's changed since then.

Still, there was serenity in the gardens...

...and a wise and good example inside.  These photos are of Brigham Young's family room.

I took these photos to remind myself of the lesson I learned on my tour that impressed me very much. 

Brigham Young was a very busy man. Not only did he have a large family, he was a prophet of the Lord, President of the Church, the Governor of Utah, and a businessman among other things. And yet with all that, he never failed to gather his family in the family room each and every night for a hymn, some counsel, prayer, and connection. Even if he was in the middle of a meeting or had guests, at the same time every evening he stopped whatever he was doing, invited any guests to join him, and gathered his family together at the end of each day. And if, perchance, a family member failed to show up, he sent him or her a formal letter "inviting" the missing member to join them. 

I love the faithful sticking to principles and the consistent attention to his role as a husband, father, and head of a family even in the midst of all the other demands on him. What an example! Many times it seems that just missing a day here or there of an established family routine isn't that big of a deal. We think "consistent" means 85% to 90% of the time. We allow all sorts of things to interfere with important family time and/or important gospel time and let our roles as whatever else crowd our roles as spouses and parents. What a mistake! I want to be like Brigham!

From "Someday" to "Seize the Day" - The Power of Splashing in Your Bucket List

We're almost halfway through this year. As usual, I'm a few months behind mentally, wondering how in the heck it is summer already when I swear we just had New Years. But this year, aside from the fact that I'm sad my kids are that much older and another one is "done" and about to move on, I'm not feeling like the past six months have just passed me by, leaving me stunned and eating dust. This year, more than any other year, I have seized the day(s) and lived on purpose. I have done some things on my bucket list and it has been a powerful shift in how I feel about my life.

Before I go any further, I just want to clarify what a bucket list is, in case there is someone reading who doesn't know. A bucket list is a person's list of wishes and dreams of things she wants to see or do or be or become before she "kicks the bucket," or in other words, dies.  That's the general idea. Some people make "Summer Bucket Lists" or lists for any season, of things they want to do before that season is over. But when most people talk bucket lists, they're talking about things they want to do before their lives are over.

You might be thinking, "Oh, you're just talking about goals." Not necessarily. I mean, I have a sincere goal to reclaim certain rooms of my house from clutter, but if I died and that wasn't done yet, I wouldn't feel badly about not having done it. But I will feel regret if I never see New York in person or hike in the Alps or take pictures in pure awe in Iceland. Neither is a bucket list a to do list. While bucket list items may be things you need to do, they're also things you want to do. I need my garage cleaned out, and I even want the finished product, but in no way do I actually want to clean the garage; cleaning the garage is a to do list item, not a bucket list item. The other thing about bucket lists is that many of the things people would put on their bucket list are things that can't just be easily done whenever--so they often get left as wishes and dreams because of the resources or effort required to make them happen. To be sure, goal setting is required to do things on your bucket list--but so is the attitude adjustment of going from "someday" to seizing the day.

Now, I haven't been able to go to any distant destinations on my bucket list this year, but I have taken the opportunity to enjoy "local" locales every chance I got. (By local I mean within a few hours' drive. I normally consider places within a 200-mile radius candidates for day trips.) These have included places I've heard about and wanted to go to for years and places I've driven by numerous times and wished I had time to stop and investigate. For the most part all it's taken is slowing down long enough to plan ahead, recognizing that I'm heading in the direction of ____, so why not leave early so I can stop there, too. It's also taken a "let it go" attitude on some days when I decided to make time by seizing a few opportunities in the now, knowing laundry and weeding and those things can wait one more day. 

From exploring Ice Castles to holding still on an island perch and purposely watching the sun set over the Great Salt Lake, I've found some rewarding ways to take charge of my time and do some things I've long wanted to do. It's not every day, of course, but by carving out that time on purpose and continuing to look for and seize opportunities, the busy-ness of day-to-day life with a family and especially the sometimes hopeless feel of my crowded and over-scheduled calendar of time that flies by aren't getting me down like before. It's also helping me be more conscious of who I spend my time with and helping me become the kind of person I want to be by making time for other people. And even little things, like watching Seven Brides for Seven Brothers (which I've always meant to do but have somehow never done until this week) and reading Uncle Tom's Cabin (another "someday" item) have helped me feel like I am acting rather than being acted upon.

Splashing in my bucket list has made me more aware of time and choices and helped me to not only enjoy myself and my time, but manage my time and self better also. So, go ahead and make a splash yourself!

Music Lyrics Matter

If you're ever concerned about your children's/teens' music choices, or you are looking for a Family Home Evening lesson, here are two good sources to bring to the discussion table. I like that together these combine science and scripture, a servant of the Lord bearing testimony as well as some proof via the scientific method. (Not because I or you or anyone should need science to back testimony or science to back the Spirit--we shouldn't and don't--but because it's really interesting when it does.)

First is an article recently published in the Deseret News titled "Literal lyrics? The effects of sex, violence and misogyny in popular music." This describes fascinating studies and results that aptly link song lyrics with increased instances of sex, sexualization, aggression and misogyny, and issues with self-esteem and ends with what parents can do.  Here is the last quote, from Jack R. Christianson:

“Music will do exactly what it is written to do. How you put lyrics to music and what music you choose to listen to affects just about every part of your life. The thing I want to do is teach my students how to make their own decisions based on how things make you feel and act. Do they go along with your moral compass? There’s a ton of good in almost all genres, but there are some that are a subculture. They intend to be bad, and they want to drag people to a dark place. It can take you to the highest peaks and lowest valleys.”

 Add to this the experience Elder Gene R. Cook of the LDS Quorum of the Seventy, which he has shared in multiple talks, including "The Eternal Nature of the Law of Chastity" and "How Not to be Discouraged."  Below is an excerpt of just part of the story.

Sometimes young people have a feeling that the music they listen to doesn’t have anything to do with chastity. And yet, as I’ve had opportunity to interview many youth in varying countries throughout the world, I’ve found that is just not so. I believe, without any doubt, that there is music of the Lord. I also believe there is good music that men have created—some romantic music, maybe some good cowboy music, and just plain fun songs, etc. Those can be okay. They can cheer you up and they’re fun to be involved with. It ought not surprise us that the devil has his own music as well. That kind of music is found throughout the world and has a great impact upon young people especially.

Let me try to bring this principle alive by relating a true story that happened with an individual of whom you probably have heard. How many of you have heard of Mick Jagger? I think almost everyone has as he is one of the most famous rock stars in the world. Well, you might be surprised to know that I had about 2-1/2 hours with him on an airplane and it was quite an experience. I’m going to relate part of that to you to try to illustrate this important point about selecting wholesome music.

Mr. Jagger and I were on a flight that originated in Mexico and were headed, I believe, to either Houston or Dallas. As I sat down in the plane, the seat next to me was empty. Later a man came and sat down by me. I noticed immediately that he was reading a rock magazine. I offered a silent prayer as I often do when I try to talk to people about the Church. I prayed that the Lord would inspire me in what to say as I talked to this man. After the prayer, I said something like, “My name is Gene Cook, I’m a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. What’s your name?” And he said, “My name is Mick Jagger.” Not realizing then who he was I said, “Well, I’m glad to meet you, Mick.” And then he said, “I said my name is Mick Jagger.” I said, “I heard you, Mick.” And then he opened up the magazine and pointed to his picture and said, “This is me.” Of course, then I finally realized who he was. I just hadn’t ever thought about sitting next to him, but it was so.

What I’m going to say is, in no way, speaking evil of Mick Jagger himself. Please understand that. I’m not speaking evil of the man, but I am of what he represents because it is wrong. It is of the devil himself, in my opinion.

Even before I knew who Mick was, I noticed that his pant leg was pulled up a little on his calf. As I looked at his leg I thought for some reason, “This fellow looks a little sick.” I’m not sure why, but that caught my attention before I even knew who he was.

After we visited back and forth a minute or two about what we were doing and all, I finally said something like, “You know, Mick, I have a question for you that I’d like you to answer for me.” He said, “Well, I’ll be glad to try.” Then I said to him, “I have opportunity to be with young people in many different places around the world, and some of them have told me that the kind of music you and others like you sing has no effect on them, that it’s okay, and that it doesn’t affect them adversely in any way. Then other young people have told me very honestly that your kind of music has a real effect on them for evil and that it affects them in a very bad way. You’ve been in this business for a long time, Mick. I’d like to know your opinion. What do you think is the impact of your music on the young people?”

This is a direct quote, brothers and sisters. He said, “Our music is calculated to drive the kids to sex.” Those were his exact words. I’m sure I had a real look of shock on my face in receiving such a bold response. He quickly added, “Well, it’s not my fault what they do. That’s up to them. I’m just making a lot of money.”

Then he told me he’d been in Mexico making a video because he could make it for about one-third of what it would cost in the United States. He told me this was a great day for them because now instead of just having audio where they could portray some of what they wanted to about sex and all, they now had videos and could have the people both hear it and see it portrayed. He said this would have much more impact on the youth, that his music was selling much more, and thus he was making much more money.

As I said, we talked for a couple of hours. Let me just share a few things that happened because it teaches the importance of what we are discussing with respect to music. As we chatted, I told him that I was married and had eight children. He told me that he was not married but that he had three children and was proud of it. He told me that he had one woman pregnant in Virginia, one in New York, and one in England, as I recall. He told me that it didn’t matter what you did in life, that you could take whatever you wanted, and that you could do whatever you wanted. He said there were no commandments, there was no God, and nothing really mattered. He indicated there was no judgment day and that you could just do whatever you felt like doing. Whatever I told him in our discussion was white he said was black.

And whatever he said was white I told him was black. He indicated that he had had the missionary lessons. In the beginning I didn’t believe that, but as we talked further I think he probably had. He told me he had had two or three lessons, and I think that was probably true because of some of his responses to me. According to him, he had been taught by missionaries in England.

He said, “As I listen to you Mormons, your problem is that you think you have all things figured out. Life isn’t that simple.” Then he would go on and explain some complex things, some theory of man. I would answer him in a very simple way from the scriptures, and he would say, “See what I mean?” He was always trying to make things much more complex than they really were.

Our conversation continued. He told me he believed in evolution and that he also believed he had descended from a monkey. I told him, with a smile, “That might be the only thing you’re right about.” We pursued the idea of evolution and the fact that if one is going to subscribe to the philosophy that he did, then he’d have to believe there was no God and that he must have evolved. And if there is no God, there are no commandments. There are no rules, and thus you can do whatever you want. He told me the importance, in his view, of freeing up the youth. He felt that they ought to be able to do whatever they wanted in spite of their parents. He said that parents were inhibiting them too much and controlling things and they ought not be doing that. It was truly astounding to me. He told me he was thankful the family, as an entity, was being destroyed. And I gathered from what he was saying that he was doing his best to help that along. 

Rappin' with Hip Hop Angels

"Angels We Have Heard on High" has always been one of my fav, fav, favorite Christmas songs. Nothing feels better to my heart and soul than belting out some gorgeous "glorias!" I just discovered a new rap version and, believe it or not, it really is worth listening to. Even though I don't like the rap/hip-hop genre in general, I can appreciate the poetry of some of it when it's full of well-done rhyme, rhythm and reason. This is such a piece.

Further, the video really, really touched me. THIS is Christmas Presence. THIS is what it's all about. THIS is somebody coupling his talents, passions, and possessions with a desire to do good, and ACTUALLY DOING IT. 

Merry Christmas! And thanks for the example, Jamesthemormon.

Harvey Slumfenburger's Christmas Present

Harvey Slumfenburger's Christmas Present is a cute story that packs a lot of good examples in a creative way and tied into our Christmas Presence theme nicely.

The story begins on Christmas Eve as Santa is tucking his reindeer, one of whom is sick, into bed. Exhausted from his year's work and night's travels, Santa wearily climbs into bed himself, only to discover that there is still one present left in his bag. The present belongs to Harvey Slumfenburger, a very poor and very good little boy who lives on a mountain far, far away. Santa knows that he cannot let Harvey down, but he also cannot take his sick reindeer out again. He gets out of bed and the rest of the story is a journey of mishaps as Santa tries one mode of transportation after another, each by asking the next person he can find along the way to help him, only to have every plane, motorbike, ski, etc. break in crazy accidents.

Santa does finally reach Harvey's humble hut at the top of the mountain, just before morning. The book has an open ending wherein Harvey awakes, sees his present at the end of the bed, opens it... and smiles... leaving the reader to wonder what the present was.

The first lessons in this book that I love are that Santa demonstrates compassion, responsibility, determination, perseverance, and patience. He understands Harvey's situation and feels a desire to bring him joy. He's tired and feels completely spent, but he's Santa and it's his job to deliver that gift, so he just does it, even though he has his own reasons not to (sick reindeer, etc.) and to make excuses. He overcomes almost insurmountable odds and just keeps going. Many people would give up after the first, second, or third accident, but Santa keeps on going. And he never gets upset.

The second group of lessons in this story are basic generosity and helpfulness. Each person Santa asks for help--on Christmas Eve and in the middle of the night no less--are perfectly willing to use their time and resources to help Santa on his way. When disaster strikes, they are sorry they can't be of further help and offer suggestions for Santa's next journey leg.

Now, this picture book has cute illustrations and is probably supposed to be a simply charming tale of mishaps. I realize that all these lessons could very well be my own projections. Nonetheless, they are there, by example, and I see them. After reading the book aloud, I asked some leading questions to help my children see them also. Then we went to the scriptures.

There is a word that has been on my mind for months:  entreat. It was in a scripture I read that has also been on my mind for months. We went to the entry for entreat in the Topical Guide of our scriptures and focused on this:  "gentle, and easy to be entreated:  James 3:17 (Alma 7:23, Helaman 7:7)."

According to Merriam-Webster, entreat means to ask (someone) in a serious and emotional way; to make an earnest request; to plead. Synonyms include appeal, beseech, beg, implore, petition, solicit. With this in mind, we read the following scriptures and discussed how they applied to the people in the story of Harvey Slumfenburger's Christmas Present, what it all has to do with "being present" and/or giving the gift of presence, and what it all means for us.

"But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be entreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy." (James 3:17)

"Oh, that I could have had my days in the days when my father Nephi first came out of the land of Jerusalem, that I could have joyed with him in the promised land; then were his people easy to be entreated, firm to keep the commandments of God, and slow to be led to do iniquity; and they were quick to hearken unto the words of the Lord--" (Helaman 7:7)

"And now I would that ye should be humble, and be submissive and gentle, easy to be entreated; full of patience and long-suffering; being temperate in all things; being diligent in keeping the commandments of God at all times; asking for whatsoever things ye stand in need, both spiritual and temporal; always returning thanks unto God for whatsoever things ye do receive." (Alma 7:23)

After all of this was a creative writing assignment. What was in the box that Santa left for Harvey? What was Harvey's Christmas present? Everyone was supposed to begin their story where the book left off, reveal what the gift was and why Harvey needed/wanted it and/or how it blessed his life.  My kids' reveals ranged from a hat and mittens to keep him warm, to a Book of Mormon to bless his whole family, to a toolkit so Harvey could work and earn money to help his family, to a slingshot that managed to shoot a rock through Santa's window far, far away. I loved this book and discussion and the writing!